Here lie the stories of the dates which have passed on.  My encounters with women which have not turned out so fantastically, but still have allowed me to learn something.  Entertain yourself.  While all the events in these stories actually took place, I have sometimes slightly changed the names of the women to protect the guilty.  It's not always their fault; sometimes it's just their nature.
 

SENIOR PROM

TO GREENVILLE, NORTH CAROLINA...TO WHICH I SHALL NEVER RETURN

SHE'S MY BEST FRIEND'S GIRL......OR LONG-LOST SISTER, AT ANY RATE

HELLO KITTY.....................YOU FUCK

WHO IN THE HELL IS EDDIE HASKELL???

DADDIES AND MOMMIES SHOULDN'T LET THEIR COWBOYS GROW UP TO HAVE BABIES

IF YOU WANT TO KISS A WOOKIE...I CAN ARRANGE THAT